Wednesday, November 9

BIZZARRO WORLD WEEK 9 WRAP-UP

Bill Murray as FDR.

My Magnitudes edged out Brian's Whateveryoucallthem thanks to Lazerface and Darren Sproles. It also helped a little that Julio Jones was on his bench. The  only thing unusual about that is that matchup is that I actually won. Big fucking deal: I'm 3-6 and lingering in 7th place.

The Biggest Blowout Award presented by Toyota is goes to Jen and her Whoopie Cakes, for routing Glenn's Ghost Hellions. All she did was hang 22 points on him, but she did with the help of Matt Hasselback, Brandon Marshall, and Reggie Bush. Wait, WHAT?!?!?!

The universe is askew. Jupiter must be drunk or something. Tara lost! DOGS AND CATS ... LIVING TOGETHER!

I knew something was weird after I saw Charlie Day host SNL the other night and the only thing funny was Seth Myers' edgy jokes. His timing was on and everything! The fuck?

Then I learned that Jessie "The Body" Ventura, Navy SEAL, Vietnam vet, pro wrestler, Hollywood actor-turned Governer, has decided to renounce his U.S. citizenship and fucking become a Mexican. Here's why.

A few yearsd ago, I heard him on Howard Stern promoting his stupid conspiracy TV show. They recalled all the major events in his life. I enjoyed his antics for a while: pissing on the establishment, not being full of shit etc. but after hearing him talk for an hour about aliens, ancient prophecies and Mexico, I knew he'd succumbed to some sort of tropical parasite. anyways, here he is at his best:

1 comment:

sprinkles was here said...

I agree. The fact that I lost is a sure sign of the apocalypse. Hide yo kids, hide yo wife, cause they rapturing everybody up in here!